Respect
Also known as consideration, dignity, regard, self-respect
The need to be treated with consideration and regard for one's inherent worth. Recognition that one matters and deserves fair treatment.
When met or unmet
When met
- Being treated with dignity
- Having your boundaries honoured
- Feeling valued as a person
When unmet
- Feeling dismissed or talked down to
- Having boundaries ignored
- Being treated as less than
Common expressions
I deserve some respect They treat me like I'm nothing All I ask is to be treated fairly
Strategies
- Setting boundaries when treated dismissively
- Surrounding yourself with people who value you
- Treating yourself with the respect you seek from others
- Speaking up when your dignity is violated
Recognition questions
- → Am I being treated as someone who matters?
- → Do the people in my life consider my needs and perspectives?
- → Do I respect myself in my own self-treatment?
Somatic markers
When met
- Standing tall, upright posture
- A sense of solidity and self-worth
- Relaxed confidence
When unmet
- Feeling small, diminished, or invisible
- Hot flush of humiliation or anger
- Urge to fight back or withdraw entirely
Shadow side
- Demanding respect through domination or intimidation
- Confusing respect with agreement or deference
- Excessive sensitivity to perceived slights
Cultural considerations
Respect markers differ greatly: titles, physical gestures, eye contact, personal space. What signals respect in one culture may seem cold or excessive in another.
Related needs
Often confused with
- Appreciation
Appreciation is about recognising value and contribution; respect is about basic dignity and consideration regardless of achievement.
- Consideration
Consideration involves thinking about impact; respect can exist without specific consideration.
- Dignity
Respect can be earned through action; dignity is inherent and cannot be forfeited.