Consideration

Also known as regard, thoughtfulness

The need to have others take your needs, feelings, and circumstances into account. A sense that people think about how their actions affect you.

When met or unmet

When met

  • Others thinking about your needs
  • Being taken into account
  • Thoughtful treatment

When unmet

  • Overlooked and ignored
  • Others acting without thinking of you
  • Feeling invisible

Common expressions

Did you even think about me? A little consideration would be nice They never think of others

Strategies

  • Expressing your needs clearly so they can be considered
  • Asking others to take specific things into account
  • Modelling consideration in how you treat others
  • Setting boundaries when consistently inconsiderate treatment occurs

Recognition questions

  • Do the people around me consider how their actions affect me?
  • Am I being thoughtlessly impacted by others?
  • Do I feel taken into account?

Somatic markers

When met

  • A sense of being held in mind
  • Relaxation from feeling considered
  • Warmth at being thought of

When unmet

  • Feeling invisible or disregarded
  • Hurt at thoughtless treatment
  • Frustration at being overlooked

Shadow side

  • Expecting others to anticipate needs without communication
  • Excessive sensitivity to any perceived slight
  • Demanding consideration without offering it

Cultural considerations

Consideration norms vary: explicit asking vs anticipating needs, individual vs collective consideration, formal politeness vs casual care.

Related needs

Often confused with

Respect

Respect is regarding someone's dignity; consideration is actively thinking about their needs.

See also